Tuesday, August 21, 2018

The Un-Nesting {SOL 8.21.18}

Both of my kids left for college on Sunday. This is the third time I've gone through the experience of moving my kids from one home to another for a year away at school.

The first year, it was my son who left. When your firstborn leaves the nest, it is a sad day, a day you never imagined would arrive as quickly as it did.

Last year, my daughter joined him in flight, leaving our nest completely empty except for our two dogs. Having BOTH kids gone was an adjustment I was dreading.

This year, as the kids packed up to leave, I was sad, but not as sad as I've been in years past. Having made this extreme adjustment before -- from a house of four to a house of two -- I knew I would get through it. Afterall, I had survived this adjustment twice already.
My first day without the kids living here I spent the day cleaning: washing the carpets, vacuuming, cleaning bathrooms, dusting, and gathering up old clothes to take to Goodwill. Getting the house back into order brought me comfort for some strange reason. It reminded me that last year when both the kids left, I found my way into a new life, a life that included the house only getting as messy as I made it, date nights with the hubby, and not having to share the hot water, the car, or the washing machine.

A life that I kinda....liked.

I guess my massive cleaning efforts yesterday were my way of ushering out one way of life for another.

And you know what? It was okay. I was okay. My kids were okay. And we will all be okay again this time.






7 comments:

  1. I love your take on getting to okay. It's a process, but you've cleaned your way to it. Happy un-nesting! And enjoy those visits and times you'll have together.

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  2. It is also a time of joy. You’ve raised two yound adults who are going into a new world with a measure of confidence. That’s huge, IMO, and something that often is unacknowledged. So, Brava! Congratulations on a major accomplishment, and on being open to making a different kind of nest, for yourself.

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  3. I love that picture of your family and your heartfelt words!

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  4. Great picture, Jen! I've been in your shoes. It is an adjustment, for sure, but after a while it feels normal and natural. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

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  5. I know the feeling that comes when my girls are here and then when they leave to go back to their lives. For me, the first couple of days are hard, but it does get easier and just knowing they're doing well makes it OK. And, yes! Great pic!

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  6. I chuckle at your honesty of "kinda liking" the new life. It's the natural order of things and when it comes, I think we're ready for the reprieve and the sense of completion that it brings. A bit of a cautionary tale: My oldest has returned home, working two part-time jobs in order to complete a master's degree over the next couple of years. Just sayin' that those flown babies sometimes return to the nest! (But this, too, is nice in its way).

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